I’ve spent a few days at my parent’s house – because my new bedroom turned out to be as cold and drafty as Siberia at night now when it’s getting colder outside, so we have been trying to insulate the windows. No wonder I’ve been so sick lately. I’m making good process in reducing stress and negative thoughts, although I keep waking up in the middle of the night with a racing heart and panic. But for some reason I’m not too worried about it, I think it’s part of this new transition phase, going from something old to something new. I’ve never been this clear minded – and so connected to myself – I think it makes me too aware of everything at times, I need to find a balance in the way I use my awareness.

I am so very inspired and I am dying to start working with my art again. I miss my demons. I miss the smell of the paint and the lightness of being swept away by the creativity. I need to create art again. I need it so much. I feel half when I’m not creating. My health issues has been blocking me from making art lately but it’s better than being blocked because of self-doubt and negativity. At least this time it’s just a matter of time until I’m well enough to go back to painting. I am ready. I feel it.